Wedding Planning Toll on Your Relationship & the Way Out

Image Courtesy: Amrit Photography

The pressure of wedding planning is overwhelming and it feels a lot on the plate for both the bride, groom along with their family members. It is a strenuous process and like every other stressful situation, it causes a lot of tension among the partners and their families too.

With the budget talks and getting everyone to the same page, agreeing to the same decisions and of course getting everything in place for the big day; there are plenty of moments when you might be caught up in an awkward situation that causes tension and conflicts in your engagement period and this might also take a toll on your relationship.

However, each difficult situation that you and your partner will be faced with will also have a tactful solution that will make your relationship even stronger and beautiful. Here are some of the major issues that might create tensity during wedding planning and take a toll on your relationship and some tips to overcome them together!

The Financial Discussion & Budget

In order to avoid an unnecessary burn in your pocket, it is very important to figure out a budget for the wedding. Having a budget always makes the rest of the planning process easier and keeps it simple. However, deciding on the budget is not an easy task. There is a lot of foreseeing required for you to plan a budget that is perfect for the wedding without overspending it including the unforeseen expenses as well. There will be a difference in requirements and expectations when it comes to the size of the wedding.

Solution: We suggest you make a list of your own where you put down the answer to how you want to spend and what do you want to personally spend on for the wedding. Compare your individual lists and consider the family lists too, keeping in mind a financial plan of at least 5 years down the line after the wedding. This will help you from going overboard.

The Guest List & Planning

Since the wedding is a socio-cultural event and it is the beginning of a happily ever after journey for the couple, but your friends and family's presence is very important. Be it an intimate wedding or a big fat wedding, the sets of people to be invited will obviously be different for the two parties. Not only will there be differences with your partner, but there might be times when you do not want to invite a certain distant aunt, but your mother thinks it right to invite her. 

Solution: Round table conferences have solved international disputes and the guest list dispute is no different. Get everyone (important for you to discuss the guest list) onboard over lunch or on a WhatsApp group and speak your mind rationally. If your parents are contributing to the budget, it is important for you to consider their opinions out of courtesy even if it is one of your biggest celebrations. Make sure you and your partner adjust to the decisions because someone here and some more there is perfectly OKAY!

Hire a Pro

If you want to take the reins in your hands and do all of it by yourself, you need to keep in mind how overwhelming it gets to plan a wedding with so many people involved and the constant pressure of perfection lingering. It is your wedding and stressing over vendor selection and planning is not the ideal way to go about it. You and your partner might face clashes over which photographer is better or which venue should be ideal. This might also create problems where one of you just seems downright uninterested in planning duties or is letting the other one feel left out.

Solution: If you are not much of a planner, hire a professional wedding planner. Even if you are that person who needs to get it done by themselves, we suggest you hire a wedding planner to avoid any confusions and awkward situations where the division of work and planning gets subjective. This gives you ample time to pamper yourself and relax to look gorgeous for your big day while keeping it all under control and letting your dream wedding come true.

Address the In-laws

There are times when either of you might feel that the other person is not taking enough stand for your opinions and ideas and instead, they are giving in to what their parents are saying. It is a natural concern for the couples and it even increases arguments and built-up pressure between the two of you. The omnipresent in-law issues can make it easy to start resenting each other.

Solution: Speak your mind to your partner and if you are close to your in-laws speak to them directly. We suggest you to first try and make them understand that you will take their suggestions into consideration. However, if they still keep persuading you for picking their choice, you can explain how overwhelming it already is. Sometimes it is also important to understand that your wedding is a very important day for your parents and your partner’s parents too. Try a 50-50 approach. Incorporate their ideas but don’t kill your dreams in the process.

The Opinions & Priorities

Wedding planning seems to have a million opinions and a thousand more suggestions. There will be times when your friends, colleagues and acquaintances will also pop up to your WhatsApp inbox to tell you what they think could be done, leave alone your family members and the in-laws. It is a milestone in your life and people near you will want to partake in the process and be more than just guests. This will create a lot of density in your relationship because both of you will face the same.

Solution: There is no harm in entertaining opinions and you never know one of them might actually be of immense help in a situation where you would not know what next. However too many opinions tend to become noise in your head and with all the stress and strenuous days, you could lose your peace. We suggest you be honest about your concerns. It might feel uncomfortable at first, but it is very important to release any built-up pressure before the big day.

Flexibility & Space for Improvisations

If you have planned the wedding to the T and you want it to happen just that way, your expectations come in the way of your happiness. You and your partner might look at any emergency situation differently where one is willing to adjust to improvisations and the other one of you is just mad for not being able to make it perfectly according to the plan. This will definitely break out into fights and might end up affecting the wedding.

Solution: Look at the bigger picture - The Wedding and your life after. It is very important to walk into a situation with an open mind ready to cease the horizons of possibilities just in case something turns south. If it suddenly rains on your parade, instead of throwing a tantrum or getting into a fight, both you and your partner should discuss this before-hand and be prepared during the planning phase itself to be more flexible and accepting to improvisations. It saves you a lot of stress!

De-stress from Wedding Planning

Among all the madness that takes over the show and the hundred errands to run from the to-do lists, not to forget the house full of guests to entertain, the process of wedding planning becomes intensely taxing. It is very obvious that emotional and mental strain does have a negative impact on your relationship with your partner and it takes a heavy toll on your relationship. Since it is a two-way street, it might increase toxic feelings due to the heat of the moment. 

Solution: It is very important to start taking breaks and not be invested in the process of wedding planning constantly. There are various ways to navigate wedding planning stress and we suggest you consider them in order to maintain the calm and fun of the wedding in its true emotions. 

It is very important to remember that you and your partner are on the same side. Beyond all opinions, suggestions, budgeting and worldly differences that might arise during the wedding planning to take a toll on your relationship, you will have to keep in mind that it is after all YOUR big day. The wedding celebrates the coming together of you and your partner and that is the pivotal reason why the rest of these subjects come into play. 

Get rid of the wedding planning stress and look forward to the bigger picture where you come out stronger as a couple and develop more intimate relationships with your families and in-laws to make it a happily married life.

You can opt for wedding planning online and create a website to make things easy and smooth. You can pick amazing professionals on board who will fit in your criteria perfectly and help you make your pre-wedding, wedding and reception an unforgettable gala!